Sittin around their bedrooms aboard ship and at the hotel/motel getting lazy, fat and stupid having sex all the time, watching television and playin video games, smokin weed, drinking alcohol, playin with their guns, thinkin about all of us that don’t want to go out like that and when they want to come burn down a manufacturin and farmin town, rape and murder us and our children, make us pick out the trash for food and water and bet on how long it’s going to be before we kill one of their punk asses, just for the hell of it now that we’ve lost practically eveerything.
I’m sorry to be sayin so but it just seems like this is the way they want it since they are possessed by the courthouse and they won’t let me succeed at anything else while I have to listen to them threaten me all day and night long and fight some of them frequently.
I wish it was different too.
Maybe, I’ll wake up one day and it will be but I won’t hold my breath either.
There go ahead and make yourselves up another fancy award to hang on your wall to tell remind yourselves your all legends in your own mind and excuse me because I have to pray to God I can survive the rest of miserable life without another injury while I grow old fast and die alone lonely and full of resentment that I ever agreed to work for the Police and Fire Department and try to keep warm and dry because it’s August and it’s raining in Seattle, Washington and the Tourists all seem to be looking at me as if I were a zoo animal again.
I guess when they hustle everybody into high rise apartment buildings and tear down all the single family homes it ain’t nothin but a rape culture whete everybody in the building stages a jail break and runs out and the police and sheriff go lookin for them to get rid of them forever and occasionally they’re the ones that get lost along the way but that must just be the way it is these days.
Maybe I got it all wrong and I’m just exhausted from livin in poverty or maybe I’m just the walkin dead.
God’s around here somewhere lookin for me I can feel it.
Who knows maybe there’s just something in the Air – Force that’s causing all of these difficult thoughts to be heard and affect me the way they do.